Lily's Village and Mine (Guest Post by Heather Von St. James)

 

I never knew what a village I had around me until I underwent one of the most joyful and one of the most difficult experiences of my life. When my beloved daughter Lily was born on August 4th, 2005, my friends and my family surrounded me. My parents, my husband’s relatives and our many friends came together to celebrate this joyous occasion. None of use knew how serious things were going to get in just a few months.


When Lily was about three and a half months old, I went back to work, but I quickly detected that something was wrong. I was tired all the time, and I couldn’t quite get a good breath. I had no energy, and finally, I went to visit a doctor. It took plenty of tests and then we got the diagnosis.


As a child, I had been unexpectedly exposed to asbestos, and now around 30 years later, the results were apparent. On November 21, 2005, I was diagnosed with malignant pleural mesothelioma, an aggressive cancer that attacks the lungs and which is caused by asbestos.


Without treatment, I was told I would have only 15 months to live. When I looked at my husband’s face and that of my new daughter, I knew that I had to do whatever it took to survive. There could be no giving up, and so we made the decision to pursue aggressive treatment. My husband and I flew to Boston, where on February 2nd, I had extrapleural pneumenectomy surgery. This means that one of my lungs was removed, and then, after 18 days in the hospital and 2 months rest, I underwent chemotherapy and radiation.


This would not have been possible if my village hadn’t swooped into the rescue. It’s funny; some of the people we thought we could rely on weren’t there, and plenty we barely knew stepped right up. While we were in Boston, my parents took Lily, and they performed marvelously. They both work, and when they couldn’t be around, their community stepped in. Their church group kept them going with lots of love and support, and they were more than willing to step in to help when necessary.


Though it sometimes hurt to think about my darling daughter doing so many firsts without me, I was comforted by the love that surrounded her, and also by the pictures and emails of her development that my parents sent. I was kept updated on her progress and the nurses loved checking out her picture.


As a family that was far bigger than I thought it would be, we have been through some amazingly rough times. However, as I always say, “Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death.” Even while I was going through the toughest time in my life, there was still plenty to eat!


Life is so rich, and when I was at my darkest moment, I still knew that I had the love of all the people around me.


To visit Heather's blog go to http://www.mesothelioma.com/blog/authors/heather/